Knock Knock
by VerdeTerra
Summary: Before he can start his search for Speedy, Roy has to find a baby sitter. Enter Artemis and Wally. Post Salvage.
1. Hello Lian!

**So this is my first little dip into Young Justice fanfiction. I've only recently come across this show but I love it. Unf Spitfire. Unf Batfam. Unf Nightwing. I have a lot of feelings about this show.**

**Anywho this is my take (because I know this has probably been written a bajillion times) on what might have happened after the end of 'Salvage'. You know, **_**those scenes. **_**ASDFGJKL. **

**Unbeta'd so there may be a few mistakes. Woopsies.**

* * *

"_You need to get your head on straight Red. For her."_

As Roy looks down at the sleeping infant in his arms, three words immediately jump into his mind.

_What the fu –  
_

* * *

Wally West is dreaming. It's one of those I'm-so-sleep-deprived-so-everything-makes-sense-until-I-wake-up-and-think-about-what-just-happened dreams that he usually experiences when's he's fallen asleep writing an essay.

_BAM!_

Strange, when did the pirate ship start firing penguin cannons?

_BAM!_

_BAM!_

_BAM!_

"-GUH!" Wally realises it's not cannons or penguins but someone practically knocking the front door down. He jumps up and opens it before the sound wakes Artemis. Because if she does wake up, then Wally doesn't want to be the only one who suffers.

"Roy?" All the people he was expecting, Roy was not one of them. Dick? Definitely. Uncle Barry or Ollie and Dinah? Unusual but possible. Roy? No. After the failed 'intervention' Wally thought he was the last person Roy would come to.

Roy shrugs and awkwardly gestures to his face. "Uh…you've got something…on your face."

"Huh?" Absentmindedly Wally reaches up and pulls a sticky note off his face. _Just reminding you that i__f you copy my essay you are dead. Love you! _He quickly crumples it up. "Heh, just a reminder from…" And then he realises who is standing in front of him. "Why are you here Roy?"

Roy adjusts the backpack. It's a miracle Wally hasn't spotted Lian yet. Of all the child carrying contraptions Jade picks the one that seems to come with its own invisibility field. Although if he didn't see it in the first place there's no way Wally would have.

"It's," he says eventually, "complicated. Can I come in?" Awkward confrontations on the front porch have never been his thing.

"Uh yeah sure, just, you know, don't wake…"

"Artemis." For a second the old Roy reappears and smirks at Wally. "Got it."

Wally awkwardly invites Roy in and notices something different about him. Nothing physical, the dude still needs sleep, a haircut, a shave and a shower and probably something to eat, but from the time Wally saw Roy earlier to now, something has changed.

_Wait, are those shoulder straps? What's Roy carrying? What is going on?_

Wally has never been tactful but something in his brain screams that this situation demands tact. Asking right out might get Roy on the offense, and Wally wants an answer not a fight.

Tact. Be tactful Wallace West. For once in your life be tactful.

"What's the backpack Roy?"

Tactfulness achieved.

"Well, it's…" Roy sighs and he gently places the backpack on the ground and picks up Lian in his arms. The baby yawns and puts her thumb in her mouth.

A baby.

That was so not on this Wally's list of 'Things Roy has hiding in his backpack'.

"Uh, Wally, meet Lian Nguyen Harper. My daughter."

Wally West is speechless. For the first time ever.

What. What. What.

How did he miss _that?_

Wally's brain is blinking 'DOES NOT COMPUTE' in big red letters. DOES NOT COMPUTE. DOES NOT COMPUTE. DOES NOT COM-.

Roy has a baby.

Roy is a father.

Lian Nguyen Harper.

Nguyen.

Jade Nguyen.

Cheshire.

_Oh holy mother of god._

In a second Wally is in the bedroom frantically shaking his girlfriend awake.

"Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis Artemis."

The blonde twenty year old groans and rolls away from her boyfriend. "Wallace West I swear to god if you're waking me because you haven't finished your Vietnamese Lit essay I'm going to kill you."

"Roy's here."

Before he even gets a chance to finish Artemis' eyes snap open and she's throwing her dressing gown on over his sports jersey, muttering a mile a minute.

"Why is he here? Is it Jade? It's Jade isn't it? I knew they shouldn't have gotten married. Out of all the dumb stupid things Jade has ever done she had to marry Roy. Roy! Even Ollie said it was a bad idea. And Ollie is never right. What's she done? Who has she killed? Is it someone important? I knew she would go back to her old life. 'I'm married now Artemis, I'm giving all that up.' Sure Jade whatever you say. Wait, what if she's dead? Is she dead? Oh god don't let her be dead. She's stupid but she's my sister."

It was funny really, seeing Artemis so flustered about her sister. Bring up Jade or her dad in a conversation and you could expect icy daggers of death, sometimes literally, pointed at you. But mention her sister at three in the morning and, well, the result was standing in front of Wally frantically trying to tie the dressing gown girdle together.

Wally grabs Artemis by the shoulders. "Babe. No. Jade is fine, I, uh, think. She's not dead I can _definitely_ tell you that. Roy's here, with, um, well, you should, just…see for yourself?" He supplies weakly.

Artemis stomps out into the living room. She glances up at the clock. Four o'clock. Far too early for this kind of thing. People don't usually turn up at their flat in the middle of the night (apart from Dick that one time). But if her brother in law - two years later and it was _still_ weird calling Roy that – turns up unexpectedly, then the least she can do is get out of bed and see what all the fuss is about.

And hey, she's not the one whose Vietnamese Lit paper is due tomorrow

_Actually_, she thinks, looking back at the clock, _due_ _today, in ten hours._

Smirking, Artemis moves towards the couch. She catches Roy's eye and waits expectantly. If he's showing up at this time he'd better have an excellent explanation. Wally appears at her side, arm around her waist, glancing at her, like he's trying to gauge her reaction.

Reaction to what? Will someone just tell her what the hell is going on so she can go back to sleep?

And then she sees Lian.

_Oh holy mother of god._

Is that a baby?

"What? When? How? Wait no I don't want to know how…I just…what? How? No, not how, never how, that's between you and Jade, forget how, but…what…?" Artemis trails off, blinking at the baby.

If the situation wasn't so serious Wally would have burst out laughing. She hasn't been this flustered since the day he randomly brought home Spitfire.

Artemis takes a deep breath, closes her eyes and tries again, "A baby. You and Jade have a baby?"

"Yes." Roy says, unsure of where this line of questioning is going.

"Okay. A baby. Sure. I can deal with tha-WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME THIS SOONER?"

Lian lets out a little moan and Artemis lowers her voice to a harsh whisper, "She what? Six months? I don't hear from you two in over a year and now there's a baby? Seriously?" She turns towards Wally, "And this didn't come up _at all_ during your little 'intervention'?"

Wally backs away a little, "What? No way babe I would have said something!"

"Uh huh." Artemis is unconvinced. "Like you could actually remember what happened anyway. Haven't you got a Lit paper to finish?" In her mind, she has a right to be crabby. Her Valentine's evening was _not _turning out like she'd planned. At all.

"Hey woah, chill." Roy raises one arm and Artemis and Wally turn to face him. Roy rubs his face tiredly. It's been one hell of a day. "I didn't say anything during the 'meeting' because I didn't know."

"You didn't know…" Artemis trails off, "That is _so _like her!"

"I haven't seen Jade in over a year. Tonight at my place that was the first time I've seen her since she left. Well, apart from the 'Wanted' ads on the news."

"Wait, you actually have a plac- oof!" Artemis' elbow finds Wally's ribs.

"Shut up ex Kid Freak. Let Daddy Roy finish his story."

Roy glares at his sister in law. Sister in law. Still weird. "_Anyway_ she turns up giving me the same crap you guys did earlier. I was going to ignore her but it's hard when she hands over your daughter as incentive."

Artemis and Wally share a look. Maybe Lian is what Roy needs to forget his obsession with finding the original Roy.

But Roy isn't finished. "That's not all. She has a lead on Speedy."

Speedy.

A lead on Speedy.

Realisation dawns on both Wally and Artemis. "And that's why you're here."

"It's a solid lead. I checked. I just need you to look after her for two, three days tops. Then I'll be back to take her. I promise."

Artemis rises up on the balls of her feet and Wally knows the shit is about to hit the fan.

"Are you serious? Roy, you've got to let it go. You have a daughter now. A daughter. My niece. Forget Speedy. Focus on her. As much as it pains me to say it, my idiot sister can handle the lead. Probably."

"You don't get it do you? I have to do this. For her. I'm doing this for her!" Voices are rising and Lian is beginning to wake up.

"And what if we say no?"

"Then I'll go to Ollie and Dinah, Batman, Superman, Wonder Women, The Justice League, anyone! I have to do this."

And that's when Wally sees it. Desperation. Roy Harper, Red Arrow, is desperate. Not desperate to pawn of his kid to the first willing person so he can find a missing clone, no. He's desperate to lay his demons to rest so he can move on. For his daughter. That's what's different. Roy's doing this for someone else now.

"We'll do it." Wally says decisively.

"You will?"

"We will?"

Wally grins at his girlfriend and gently takes Lian out of Roy's arms. "Sure, it's only a few days right?" He says, trying to lighten the atmosphere, "Bonding time with Aunty Arty huh Lian?"

And Artemis suddenly finds herself holding a baby. Her sister's baby. Her niece. Her sister, Jade, ruthless assassin has a baby. A baby. She's an aunt. Wow.

Her mom is going to freak.

"Fine," she sighs, shifting the baby so Lian's head is resting on her shoulder. "Three days max. If you're not back here in 72 hours then I am alerting anyone and everyone in spandex and I'm coming to looking for the both of you. _With_ arrows."

"Deal." Roy gets up and kisses Lian on the head. He's known about his daughter for less than a day and already he'd do anything for her. Hell, she's the reason he's doing this now. It's no longer about him. It's about her. "Bye Lian. I'll be back soon. I promise."

And then he's gone.

Just like that.

Five minutes ticks by. Neither of them move, neither of them speak. The silence is punctuated only by the sounds of Lian snoring softly.

Artemis exhales deeply. "What…just…happened?"

"We got serious babysitting duties?" Wally blinks. Baby sitting. A baby.

"Yeah. We did." Artemis looks at the baby and realises just how over their heads they are. "Wally what the hell are we going to do? We can only _just _look after the dog now. And now we have a baby to look after for god knows how long. I have classes tomorrow. And the day after, and the day after that. So do you. And finals are soon. And we have no bed for her, no baby food, no bottles, no diapers…"

"Hey," Wally slips his hand around her waist and pulls her close. "We're ex superheroes, we'll figure it out. Besides, it's just three days right?" The more he says it, the more he's convincing himself it's true.

His tone is so comforting Artemis almost believes him. Almost. She holds Lian a little bit tighter and beings to walk out the room. "Uh huh. I'm going to sort out somewhere for Lian to sleep and you are going to call Ollie and Dinah. Right now."

"Why?" Wally is confused.

"Because," Artemis says, turning back, "I doubt Roy has told them about Lian - who I might add has red hair and Vietnamese eyes - so if they come over anytime soon, knowing them they'll jump to conclusions and you are going to find out how fast you can really run." She throws her boyfriend a smirk as she leaves the room.

Ah.

Right.

He should probably call Uncle Barry too. Just in case the speedster decides to make one of his 'surprise visits'.

Tomorrow.

Yes, tomorrow.

"Wally!" Artemis' voice carries from the bedroom. "I can't hear dialing!"

Well, time for what's going to be the most awkward conversation of Wally's life.

* * *

Phone calls at five in the morning are never a good sign.

But as Ollie listens to Wally's almost incoherent ramblings, he catches one important detail. And three words immediately jump into his mind.

_What the fu –_

* * *

**Truthfully Artemis probably would have yelled at Roy for _a lot _longer but hey, it's fanfiction right?**

**And I **_**know **_**calling their dog Spitfire is **_**so **_**cliché but I'm pretty sure most people called it anyway.**

**I really can't wait to see everyone's reaction to Lian in the show. Can you tell?**

**ASDFGHJKL. This show.**

***goes back to reading comics***


	2. Fairly Odd Sort Of Grandparents

**You guys! Ohmylordy. Your responses to the first chapter of Knock Knock was like aslfkjasflakjfweifsldfkaa.**

**So I'm continuing it. Just a heads up, ********I think in the actual comics Ollie is 'Uncle Ollie' but pssh I want Grampa Ollie.**

**A/N: If I owned Young Justice Dick Grayson would join a swim team and be shirtless all the time. So yeah, I own nothing. **

* * *

Dinah Lance is used to interrupted sleep. Phone calls, beepers, assassins, end of the world. The usual. Being part of the Justice League, little to no sleep was part of the contract. No seriously. It was in tiny, tiny print but it was there. Trust Batman to cover all bases.

But this phone call is different.

Firstly, it has Ollie up and out of bed within five seconds. And that in itself no easy feat. The archer is a heavy sleeper. Very heavy. And stubborn. The time Batman called an emergency Justice League meeting at four in the morning, Dinah was two seconds away from canary crying him out of bed.

Thank god she found the air horn she'd bought him as a joke last year instead.

Secondly, Ollie isn't putting on his Green Arrow get up so it's not Justice League related. Which makes it more intriguing and worrying at the same time.

"Ollie? What is it?" Dinah cracks an eyelid and sees her boyfriend with the phone clutched between his ear and shoulder while he tries to put a pair of pants on.

"Wally."

Wally? What on earth? Apart from Roy's intervention earlier, Dinah hasn't seen Wally since he quit. She assumed he was living it up at Stanford with Artemis. So why was he calling at five in the morning?

So many questions for so early in the morning.

Ollie indicates to the phone. Dinah can faintly hear Wally's incoherent babbling. He obviously hasn't noticed Ollie has stopped responding. Whatever is happened it's got the ex speedster really frazzled.

Ollie clicks the 'end' button. "We gotta go."

"To Palo Alto? Now? It's such a long drive." Dinah goes to her wardrobe and pulls out a pair of pants, a plain t-shirt and a jacket.

"We'll zeta tube." Damn shirts, they never button up right when you're in a hurry. He sighs and tries again.

"Wait." Dinah pulls on his hand, puzzled. "There's a zeta tube in Palo Alto? Since when?"

Ollie stop buttoning and avoids her gaze. "Since, uh…." Crap.

Dinah smirks and tries not to laugh. Busted. "Since you asked the League to install one?"

"Possibly."

This time Dinah does laugh and leans over to kiss her boyfriend. "Well I think it's sweet that you wanted to keep an eye on Artemis."

"It's not her I'm keeping an eye on. It's Wally."

Ah. Well, close enough.

Ollie looks down at his watch. "Come on. We gotta go."

"Hm." Dinah folds her arms in front of her chest. They have to go to Palo Alto at five am and she still doesn't know why. "Oliver Queen. What is happening? Why did Wally call you?"

"Roy."

"Roy what? What's happened? Is he okay?" After the failed intervention and the late night phone call and Ollie's behaviour now, her brain is making all sorts of wild conclusions. 99.9% of them don't end well.

No that's a lie. All of them don't end well.

"Lian Nguyen Harper." Is all Ollie says as he grabs her hand and half drags her outside. The night is chilly and the cold isn't helping Dinah's thought process right now.

Lian Nguyen Harper? What? Who is…and then it clicks.

Oh.

OH.

_Oh my god._

_I'm practically a grandmother.  
_

* * *

_Beeeeeeeeeeep._

"Mr. Queen? Hello? Hello?"

He's gone. Wally sighs with relief as he puts the phone call back on the receiver. Not the best phone call he's ever made, he's usually far more articulate. Usually.

He rubs his eyes tiredly. Any hope of sleep practically vanished when Roy knocked on the door. Wally sits down at the couch then groans as he remembers his unfinished essay.

He wonders what excuse he could use to get out of writing it. The truth?

_Excuse me sir but I was unable to complete this essay due to my girlfriend's brother in law dropping off his infant daughter with us because he has to go with his estranged wife to find where the original version of him is being kept, because he is, in fact, a clone._

Yes. Perfect.

He stands up and prepares to suffer through the rest of the essay when Artemis walks into the room. She drops facedown onto the couch with an exaggerated sigh. Wally grins and perches next to his girlfriend on the arm of the couch.

"Rough day?"

"Smuf uhp." Artemis replies, her face still buried in the couch

"Hey it could be worse. You could still have to do your Vietnamese Lit Essay."

Artemis rolls over and sits up, pretending glaring at him. "Not helping."

Wally slips off the arm and lands next to Artemis. He puts an arm around her shoulder and she tucks her feet up before putting her head on his shoulder. They stay like that for a little bit; he comforting her, and her still freaking out about the fact that her sister actually had a baby.

And the fact that that baby is sleeping in her bed in the next room.

Spitfire, still a little confused about the events that have transpired, simply curls up at their feet. If it's one thing that dog can do is sleep through anything.

"You talk to Ollie?"

Wally nods slowly. "Yup." Talk to. Or blather at until he hung up. Same thing really.

"And?"

"I don't know he didn't say anything. And then he hung up on me."

Typical.

Artemis would never forget the face he made when she told him that she was quitting the superhero business to go to Stanford with Wally.

Perhaps she should have told him they were also going to live together then too.

Good times.

Artemis yawns loudly. The events of the night have left her worn out. "Well at least it's mostly sorted. I hope. But anyway, I'm going to go to bed. You're…uh…gonna have to sleep on the couch. Lian's on your side."

"Eh I'm used to it." Wally shrugs.

_Oof!_

Artemis wacks him in the face with the pillow. Wally mimes being hurt and she rolls her eyes before kissing him.

"You're a dork." She says, smiling through her obvious tiredness. Finding out you're an aunt really takes a toll on a person.

"I know." Wally grins back, leaning in for another kiss.

_BAM! BAM! BAM!_

Artemis' smile quickly vanishes. "Now what?" She's thinking of putting a sign up that says: _GO AWAY NIGHT TIME IS FOR SLEEPING._

Wally shrugs as he speeds to the door and opens it.

And there's Oliver Queen and Dinah Lance. Just casually standing outside like they're waiting to be invited in for breakfast. Except Ollie isn't smiling and they're totally not there for breakfast.

"Hi." Wally squeaks and then closes the door.

"What is it?" Artemis asks her boyfriend who rapidly backing away from the door. Even though she has a sneaking suspicion it's not a what but a _whom_. There are only two people in the world that can freak out Wally West. One of them is her mother. The other is Oliver Queen.

And her mother isn't the type to spring a surprise visit on them at five thirty in the morning.

Artemis sighs and gets up off the couch. She opens the door and sure enough, Ollie and Dinah are standing outside. Artemis: 1. She gestures for them to come in. Might as well get this over with.

They all stand awkwardly in the middle of the living room. Artemis wonders how to begin a conversation about how the child of your assassin sister and your brother in law, whom no one knew about until tonight, is less than ten feet away because her parents dropped her in your lap and are going to look for the person your brother in law was cloned from?

Because she assumes that's why they're here.

Not even mentioning the two people in front of you are practically the child's grandparents. Well, sort of.

"So…Roy and Jade have a baby."

How to start an awkward conversation 101 with Oliver Queen. Lesson one: get straight to the point.

"Um. Yes." Good start Artemis.

"And from what I gather from Wally's…phone call, is that Jade…Cheshire, has a lead on Speedy and they're both going to find him."

"Leaving us with babysitting duties." Wally finishes. "But I…I'm pretty sure I told you this over the phone so why…."

Awkward silence. This is going exactly as planned.

"Can we see her?" Dinah blurts out suddenly.

Oh.

Really? Couldn't they have waited until a decent hour?

Or called?

Artemis sighs, any hope of getting some sleep slowly vanishing. "Of course."

She carefully opens the door of the bedroom. _Please be asleep, please be asleep._

Sure enough, Lian isn't asleep. She squeals happily when she sees Artemis and raises her arms like she wants to be picked up. Artemis obliges, sitting Lian on her hip. Lian looks up at smiles at her.

This is her sister's baby.

Her niece.

Christ.

Nope, still not over it.

Artemis watches re-enters the living room with Lian. All eyes turn to Lian who is happily chewing on the ends of Artemis' hair. Except for Wally who is looking sadly at his unfinished essay.

"Can I hold her?" Dinah asks, a little shyly, which is weird for someone who can turn your brain to mush just by opening her mouth. And if she doesn't open her mouth she could still kill you with one hand tied behind her back.

Artemis smiles and gently hands Lian over. Lian lets out a little wail but as soon as she's in Dinah's arms she stops and gurgles loudly.

"She looks like your sister." Dinah observes, smiling as Lian yawns and puts her thumb in her mouth.

"Thank god." Artemis jokes. "That hair is all Roy though."

"I think that was inevitable. I don't think that gene is recessive in the slightest." Dinah turns to Ollie and grins, "Want to hold her Grampa Ollie?"

Artemis laughs. Grampa. She was so going to wind him up about that some other time.

"I…uh, sure?" It's kind of funny really, watching giant Ollie try to cradle tiny Lian in his arms. Hand a man a baby and suddenly he forgets how to hold anything. Hand a superhero a baby and it's like giving Superman kryptonite.

It's a nice moment for about a second until Lian, sick of being handled so much, begins to cry. Ollie looks helplessly at Dinah who suppresses a smile.

Artemis steps forward and takes Lian back. "Time to go back to bed I think."

"I'll help." Dinah says softly, stroking Lian's forehead. She's glad Ollie half panicked at Wally's phone call and rushed over. This child is adorable.

She's totally going to volunteer for babysitting duties next time.

And every time after that.

While Dinah and Artemis take Lian to bed, Wally stands awkwardly with Ollie.

"So…" Wally starts. He isn't scared of the guy who taught his girlfriend over fifty ways to kill someone with an arrow. Nope. Not at all.

"I'm glad you called." Ollie says suddenly, taking Wally by surprise.

"You," he squeaks, "you are?"

"I mean if we had turned up and seen Lian without an explanation, what conclusions would Dinah and I have drawn? And I like you too much to beat the crap out of you."

Wally chokes on his own spit and turns bright red. "Yes…I mean no! I mean…no sir, Green Arrow, sir."

Ollie lets out a deep laugh and slaps Wally on the shoulder. Wally shoots forward and almost falls but manages to stay on his feet.

"I'm kidding! For a speedster you sure can't take a joke."

Wally coughs. "Heh. Sure. Joke. Of course. I knew that."

"Right." Ollie says, somewhat sceptically. "So are you two going to be okay with Lian for…however many days she's going to be here?"

Wally rubs his hands over his face tiredly. "I think so. Apart from food," he begins ticking things off on his fingers, "and clothes and diapers and food and going to classes and bedding arrangements and food…"

"I get the picture." Ollie laughs before pausing. "If you want I could get a crib or something for her tomorrow?"

"Really? Thanks! That would be great! You'd think I'd be used to sleeping on the couch by now, but, you know."

"I do know." Ollie winks at Wally knowingly, just as Dinah and Artemis enter the room.

"What?" They ask simultaneously, immediately noticing the suspicious grins of their respective partners.

"Nothing."

"Uh huh." Neither of them is convinced but they let it drop.

"Well I guess we'll be going now." Dinah says, a little wistfully and Artemis can tell she's really taken to Lian.

"I'll organise that crib delivery for later today," Ollie says, more to Wally and Artemis wonders what they've been talking about.

Wally grins. "Sweet. Thanks."

"If you need anything else, call. Really." Dinah says, just as Ollie opens the front door.

Artemis gives her a quick hug, "Of course. I'll be sure to offer your services to Jade next time I see her." She pauses, "After I kick her butt."

Everyone laughs as Ollie closes the door behind Dinah. They step into the cold morning and stand on the front porch for a moment, both still sort of reeling from the events of the night.

"I want one." Dinah whispers sadly. She doesn't offer anything else but it's clear what she means.

Ollie takes her hand and kisses her on the forehead. "I know."

* * *

As soon as Dinah and Ollie have gone Wally and Artemis wearily collapse on the couch.

"I am so tired."

"Tell me about it. And I still have to finish my essay."

"Poor Baywatch."

Wally crinkles his nose, "No, don't bring that back. Please. I only just got Nightwing to stop using it."

Artemis smirks before a massive yawn almost splits her face in half. "Ugh I am way too tired to argue with you."

"And that's how I win these things. Come on." Before she can protest Wally scoops her up and carries her bridal style to their bedroom.

Lian is curled up on Wally's side, surrounded by pillows so she can't roll off. Her thumb is in her mouth and she's snoring softly. Kind of like Jade did when she was a kid.

Wally puts Artemis down beside the bed and kisses her.

"Night babe."

Artemis gets into bed and pulls the duvet over her shoulders. "Night…Baywatch."

"Oh you're evil."

"I know."

Wally looks back and smiles at the sight of Artemis and Lian in bed. He's never used the word adorable to describe anything but in this situation, it fits.

He can't wait to sleep in his own bed though.

Back in the living room Wally sits down at the table and pats Spitfire on the head absentmindedly while he mulls over his essay. It's only then he sees Artemis' essay right next to it with a note:

_You owe me._

_x_

Wally grins, "Babe. You rock."

* * *

**Next up: I don't know. You guys decide!**

**Also I recently got tumblr (so late to the party) but I'll be posting updates and the occasional drabble on there so you know...just a heads up :P**

**imaginaryvigilante dot tumblr dot com****  
**

***shameless self promotion* **

**Oh also if anyone would like to be a beta for this story I would love you 5eva!**


	3. For Whom The Cellphone Tolls

**If I gave you a 4,000 word chapter would that make up for the massive delay? **

**Because that's what you're getting :)**

**A/N: I don't own Young Justice but I do own every spelling and grammar mistake...**

* * *

"Barry, darling, did you remember to get milk this morning?" Iris calls from her spot in front of the kitchen counter.

Before her l) a pile of cook books and loose recipes that have accumulated over the years. If there's one thing Iris loves to do, it's cook. The pages of the books are well thumbed and slightly yellowed, and it's easy to spot her favourite one because the once vibrant cover has long since faded. For years her sister has been trying to get her to put all of her recipes on the computer, but there's just something comforting about flipping through a book to find that perfect dish.

"Barry!" She calls again, placing the cook book she's holding back onto the counter.

"Huh?" Barry's head appears around the corner. "Did I get what now?"

"Milk?"

"Oh milk. Uh," he goes over to the refrigerator and opens it. "Nope," he says decisively.

Iris rolls her eyes at him, "I could have done that. Can you go get some please? I want to make this," she holds up the recipe she's decided on; some fancy French styled crème brulee, "for tonight and I can't without milk."

"It's your birthday. Let me cook for all of us tonight," he murmurs persuasively, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Uh uh. My birthday, I get to do what I want. And I want to cook. You can get milk for me though."

"Anything for the birthday girl." Barry teases, kissing her. "Back in a flash."

He's gone before Iris has a chance to roll her eyes at him again, but she does it anyway before turning back to her recipe.

_Place the cream, milk and vanilla seeds in a medium saucepan over medium heat…_

* * *

Three days.

It has been three days since Roy had turned up to their place and asked them to babysit his daughter.

Well, his and Jade's.

And technically it's only been two and a something days, but the way Artemis is biting her nails, you'd think it'd been two and a something weeks.

And the way she keeps sneaking looks at her archery trophies when she thinks he isn't looking is _not_ helping the situation.

He should say something.

Maybe.

Wally sits on the floor surrounded by children's toys; fluffy ones, educational ones and one that squeaks "I LOVE YOU," when you squeeze it. Ollie has given them a lot more than just a cot; right now it looks like a toy factory exploded in their living room. Wally suspects most of it will travel back to Star City with Ollie and Dinah when Roy comes back.

_If._

If Roy comes back.

But despite the toys, Lian finds the dog far more exciting than any toy could ever be.

_Poor Spitfire, _he thinks, as Lian proceeds to pull on the dog's ear, using it to clamber on his back.

"Whoop, let's hold back on the dog riding until Grampa Ollie buys you a saddle 'kay kiddo?" Wally says scooping Lian up in his arms. She squeals loudly and holds her arms out for Artemis.

"I guess we know who the favourite is then," Wally jokes, plonking Lian down in Artemis' lap. The first thing the infant yanks is another of her favourite toys: a handful of blonde hair.

"Ow, ow, ow!" Artemis yelps and Wally quickly detangles Lian's fist from Artemis' head. Once her hand and several strands of blonde hair are free Lian decides she's had enough of this lap business and wriggles onto the floor, making a beeline for the cuddly, or in Wally's opinion, demon possessed, 'I LOVE YOU' teddy.

Wally smirks at his girlfriend who is carefully inspecting the side of her head, "You continued fighting without a complaint that time you broke a rib, but a six month old pulls your hair and you scream blue murder?"

"Yes. Ow." Artemis fiercely rubs the spot on her head. "Ow. Am I bald?"

Wally gets up off the couch and inspects her hair for a second, "Yup. The back of your head is completely bald," he declares dramatically.

Artemis elbows him in the stomach, "Har har. Funny." She responds drily, dragging out the 'y' before going back to biting her nails and staring at the clock.

Well, at least she's not staring at her archery trophies anymore.

Wally sits down on the floor next to Lian. "They'll be back."

"What? Oh. I know. I just…" She sighs loudly and puts her feet up on the coffee table, "This whole thing is lot more than babysitting you know? Like what happens when they come back? I highly doubt my sister is going to become Miss Housewife. I mean, can you imagine Jade cooking? She made me toast once when we were little; did you know that toasters can catch on fire? And what happens when Roy wants to go on a mission or something? Is he gonna turn his quiver into a kiddy carrier?" Artemis tips her head back on the couch and groans loudly. She's been thinking about this ever since Roy turned up on their doorstep and it sort of all just came out at once. Normally she's good to 'go with the flow' or whatever it is her sister does, but it's not just Jade anymore. Not even Jade and Roy. It's Jade, Roy and Lian.

A family.

Sort of.

Not really.

She groans again. This whole idea of how a normal family should work is still relatively new to Artemis.

But even then she's pretty sure this isn't how a normal family acts.

Normal families, she supposes, probably have a lot less spandex in their wardrobes.

Less weapons too.

"Hey," Wally says, tickling Lian who squeals in delight, "stop worrying. We're superheroes, what's the worst that can happen?"

"Don't quote The Incredibles at me Wallace West. I know where you live."

* * *

The streets aren't busy today, and Barry has no trouble staying out of sight as he zips to the store for milk. He could easily walk there in ten minutes, but he wants to spend as much time with Iris as he can. With six Leaguers off world, the rest of them have been trying to cover in whatever ways they can. Unfortunately covering means taking more shifts up at the Watchtower.

Barry slows to a stop in an alleyway just across the street and strolls into the store. The bell gives a little ding and the owner looks up from his place at the till. Barry gives him a nod and goes over to the chillers. He grabs a carton of milk, and after a second thought, plucks a bouquet of red roses from its holder.

Perfect.

"Twenty dollars." The owner says and Barry has to dig around in his pocket for a couple of seconds before he pulls out a handful of crumpled bills.

"I hope she likes them." The owner grins as Barry grabs the milk and bouquet off the counter.

"I know she will." He replies and heads outside.

As he begins to walk home, Barry actually starts to whistle. No crime needs his attention, no villain needs their butt whooped and he's about to go home and spend the evening with his lovely wife and family.

All is well in the world.

Of course at this particular moment, just as he's about to speed home, his 'in case of emergency' earpiece bleeps and Tornado announces that Barry's presence is requested immediately at the Watchtower.  
Lovely.

* * *

Iris hums to herself as she twirls the vacuum around the room. Barry isn't back yet, and the chickens are in the oven, the salads are in the fridge, so despite still having to make the dessert, everything is pretty much ready for tonight. She goes over the rug one last time before switching it off at the wall.

She wanders back into the kitchen just as the front door opens and Barry zooms in.

"Justice League stuff at the Watchtower I'll be back as soon as I can I have your milk and flowers for you red ones because I love you now I have to go but I love you bye."

And he's gone again.

_Well, _Iris thinks, as she inspects the bouquet, _at least he remembered milk._

* * *

The three of them are sitting at the kitchen table. Lian is in her high chair - another Oliver Queen buy - with Spitfire sitting dutifully underneath, readily available to lick up stray food that might fall his way. So far only a few spoonfuls of blueberry yogurt have found its way below.

While Artemis checks the baby formula instructions, Wally rustles around in the fridge. He emerges with half the leftover lasagne they had three nights about and chucks it in a heatproof dish before putting it in the microwave.

He steals half of Artemis' sandwich while he waits for the timer to reach zero. Not that she minds; she got used to him stealing her food a long time ago.

Plus she knows where his secret stash of chocolate is.

Wally munches on the sandwich and glances at the calendar on the corkboard beside the pantry. The corkboard was his idea, mainly because Artemis kept losing her car keys and bowl they used to keep the keys in was thrown at his head during an argument they had that one time.

Fun times.

His attention is drawn to today's date, which has something underlined three times.

Something important obviously.

'AUNT IRIS'S BIRTHDAY'

Oh crap.

Wally vaguely remembers a phone call from his mom about a week ago about dinner at Barry and Iris's but with Roy and Lian, it slipped his mind.

"Ooh crapcrapcrapcrapcrap." He mutters.

Artemis puts down the baby bottle she's been testing on her wrist, "What's wrong?"

"Aunt Iris' birthday. Not only did I forget because I am the worst nephew ever, but I _also_ forgot we're invited over for dinner tonight."

Oops.

Artemis looks over at Lian who is happily smacking her hands on the plastic tray of her high chair. "Would you like to maybe ring Iris and explain we will be bringing my infant niece with us? Or maybe we could just turn up and see how that goes?"

Wally smirks as he imagines then pulling up to Barry and Iris' house with Lian.

Shrieking. Lots of shrieking.

_How come everyone in our lives jump to one conclusion when Lian is involved? _

As he punches in Barry and Iris' home number, he watches Lian fling her yoghurt spoon in Artemis's direction. He tries very hard not to laugh as it hits her square on the nose.

He fails.

He's laughing so hard he misses Iris picking up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Aunt Iris! Hi!" He splutters while Artemis shoots daggers his way as she prises Lian free and carries her to the bathroom to clean up the remnants of lunch out of her hair.

For someone who didn't know the words to 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' until she were sixteen, Artemis is pretty good at this whole looking-after-a-tiny-human thing.

"Wally? Are you alright?"

His aunt sounds so worried Wally stops laughing immediately, "Yes Aunt Iris, I'm fine but, uh, about dinner tonight, Artemis' sister and Roy had a baby and they went off to find real Roy and they left the baby with us so we'll be bringing her tonight."

There's a slight pause.

On the other end, Iris lets out a laughs, "Oh how wonderful! Artemis is an aunt! Let me ring your mother and get her to bring some of your old baby stuff."

Wally groans inwardly, remembering the pink high chair his distant great, great, great something or rather aunt had sent his parents for Christmas one year. Not wanting to be mean, they'd photographed him in it and sent them to her. Unfortunately, his mom had also stuck copies in the family album.

He was so not going to live this down.

" …great!"

There's a small ding from Iris' end. "Oh Wally, I have to go! I will see you, Artemis and…"

"Lian."

"Lian. How cute!" There's another, slightly louder ding in the background, "I will see you, Artemis and Lian later tonight then. Bye Wally."

"Bye Aunt Iris."

_That was considerably anti climatic, _Wally thinks as he puts the phone down and tries to figure out what time they'll get to Barry and Iris' if Artemis starts getting ready now.

* * *

"We are _not _taking my six month old niece through a zeta tube!" Artemis says from her place in the bathroom. Wally doesn't know why she uses a torture device to make her eyelashes curl but that's women for you.

"I went through one when I was little – "

"And look how you turned out!"

Okay he walked into that one.

"They're harmless babe. It's just simple planetary transportation by dematerialising particles and then atomically reconstructing them at the destination location. Nothing like boom tubes, now _they_ can get hairy."

"Well that's good…no! Wally! Stop doing that thing where you rationalise things with science and make it sound okay."

"It was hardly a science-y rationalisation babe." He says kissing her, "besides, how many time have we used zeta tubes, and we're okay. Besides, how do you think Roy got here with her in the first place?"

He's right, but Artemis doesn't want to admit it.

Her face says otherwise though and Wally knows he's won. He grins and kisses her on the cheek. "Besides, if we zeta tube, you can spend more time getting ready." He dashes laughing away as Artemis throws her mascara at him.

* * *

It's been a long time since Artemis has stepped inside a zeta tube. Apart from visiting her mom in Gotham, or Wally's parents in Central City, there aren't a lot of places that they need to zeta tube to. Besides, both families tended to visit them instead of the other way around.

_Recognised Artemis, B07._

This isn't weird at all.

Using a zeta tube for something other than team related stuff.

Yup.

It's weird.

Artemis arrives in first, and programs Lian in for authorised entry. She figures Roy would have deleted her entry the first time.

Things like that he's careful with.

Other things, not so much.

_Permission granted Lian Harper, A07, authorisation: Artemis, B07._

_Recognised Kid Flash, B03._

Lian is surprisingly undisturbed by her zeta tube trip and sits contentedly on Wally's hip.

Because Barry is really one of the only superheroes operating from Central City, the Justice League installed the zeta tube reasonably close to his house.

Which is quite thoughtful of them when you think about it.

They make it to the West house just as Wally's parents are pulling up. Mary waves at them both from the passenger seat.

She's already out of the car before Rudy has a change to properly park.

"Wally!" She cries, enveloping her son in a bone crushing hug.

Luckily he had the foresight to hand Lian to Artemis.

"Mom…choking…not breathing."

"I swear you lose more freckles every time I see you! Artemis darling how are you?" Mary turns her attention to Artemis, who is trying to detangle Lian's hand from her hair again.

"I'm…ow…good Mary…ow!"

With an experienced hand Mary detangles Lian's little hand from Artemis' hair. "There you go dear. My, isn't she a cutie?"

Artemis hikes Lian up higher on her hip and boops Lian on the nose, "She is isn't she?" Lian gurgles in response, which just solidifies her cuteness and makes everyone, even Wally, want to go awwwww in a really cliché voice.

Before the sound escapes from his lips, Iris appears in the doorway, "I thought I heard voices! Come in! Come in!"

The four of them make their way inside; Rudy joining back of their little group after parking the car carrying something that looks an awful lot like a pink high chair.

Wally shudders.

"Where's Uncle Barry?" He asks trying to take off his left shoe with his right foot. After thirty seconds he gives up and bends down to untie them.

If there was ever any doubt that he once ran into a wall by accident there isn't any more.

"Watchtower." Iris calls from the kitchen.

There's a slight pause as Wally and Artemis exchange a look. They know all about the situation with the Justice League and the six that are currently off world from Nightwing. It's a subtle reminder of the life they didn't quite leave behind and no matter how hard they try; they'll never quite be rid of it.

Of course, they wouldn't have it any other way.

Luckily Wally's stomach growls ravenously and the tension that was beginning to settle vanished as quickly as it began.

Lian finds this new sound hilarious and starts to giggle uncontrollably.

"I'm glad someone finds my pain funny. Can we eat? I'm starving!"

Artemis mutters something that sounds an awful lot like 'what else is new' as they move into the dining room.

"We brought Wally's old high chair for Lian," Rudy explains, setting up the horrible monstrosity. It's a blasphemous shade of pink, with unicorn stickers peeling from almost every inch of the thing. The word 'princess' must have been painted on the back, but most of the letters have been scratched off so it now reads 'pine'.

If a six year girl threw up, it would look like this high chair.

Artemis bites back a snort as she places Lian in it and raises both eyebrows at Wally. They're so high they almost disappear off her face.

The speedster flushes a deep red, "It was a gift! From my great, great, great, great something twice removed aunt! She was blind and deaf and _really_ weird!"

"I see." Artemis says as nonchalantly as she can. She makes a mental image to take a photo of it later and send it to Nightwing.

And everybody else in her contacts list.

Iris steps out of the kitchen carrying a huge bowl of something, Artemis isn't too sure what but it smells amazing.

"Barry said he wouldn't be long but he hasn't phoned and I made _plenty _so we may as well dig in."

Wally looks up from his plate that's already piled high with food to find everyone staring at him. "What?"

His mother laughs, "It's nice to know some things never change."

* * *

Barry Allen is late.

Very late.

He'd tried explaining to Tornado that he needed to be somewhere else, but Tornado had simply turned around and asked if Barry needed the bathroom.

And okay it wasn't _that _funny; Oliver didn't need to laugh so hard.

Or for so long.

But whatever, the meeting was over, he'd punched Ollie in the arm really hard and now he was on the way home to have dinner with his wonderful wife and family.

_Recognised, Flash. O4._

It takes him a matter of seconds to get changed and scoot home. Barry slows to a stop just around the corner and sees Rudy and Mary's car. There's no sign of either Artemis' or Wally's car, so Barry assumes they couldn't make it. Shame. He was looking forward to seeing them. It's been awhile since they'd made the trip over. And when they did he was usually either on patrol or up at the Watchtower.

Barry fumbles with his keys for a second, before unlocking the front door. Laughter fills his ears and his stomach rumbles at the smell of Iris' cooking.

"I'm hoooooooooome."

"We're in here babe," Iris's disembodied voice calls from the dining room.

Barry gives Iris a quick kiss as he sits down at the table. He's about to grab a plate and dig in before he realises Artemis and Wally are sitting at the table.

It's about then when he sees the baby sitting in Wally's old high chair.

Barry blinks.

No one is quite sure what to say, but it's rather funny trying to watch Barry understand the situation.

"Baby." He says cleverly.

Wally watches as his uncle looks from him to Artemis, from Artemis to Lian, from Lian to him and back again. They'd all talked about this earlier and agreed to see how long it took Barry to draw _that_ conclusion.

And it seems he was doing just that.

"I know it's been a _long_ time since I've seen you guys...but, uh…baby?"

His face.

It's a mixture of helplessness and complete and utter astonishment.

It's quite hilarious actually.

Lian squeals loudly which only confuses Barry more and the face is he making is so hilarious that Wally lets out a half laugh, half snort and manages to choke on his drink at the same time.

"It's Artemis' niece Uncle Barry," he says between splutters.

"Eh?"

Wally is still half choking so Artemis steps in to explain, "This is Lian. Roy and Jade's baby."

The look on Barry's face appears again.

"I know right?!" Wally says, apparently having recovered from his coughing fit. "My face exactly!"

Barry nods slowly. "Right. Let me grab some food and while I eat, you two can tell me everything. I take it Ollie knows?"

Wally and Artemis nod.

"Good. I can't wait to change his name in my phone to Grampa Ollie."

* * *

It's late by the time Artemis and Wally leave. After story time and one hilarious phone call by Barry to 'Grampa Ollie', Iris brought out her amazing crème brulee and Rudy pulled out a pack of cards and they spent the rest of the night trying to prove Wally was cheating at Go Fish.

He wasn't.

They say their goodbyes and begin their walk to the zeta tube. Lian is sleeping on Wally's shoulder, thumb in mouth, clearly exhausted from her first experience with the West/Allen family. Artemis can't blame her; the first time Wally brought her over, she'd conked out on the couch and Wally had run her back to Gotham.

Which was nice, but waking up a fair distance away from where you went to sleep is a bit unnerving.

They make it home without a hitch and Artemis kicks off her shoes the second she's unlocked the door.

Much better.

"I'll put her to bed," Wally says softly as Lian let's out a little snore.

Artemis nods sleepily as she drops onto the sofa and switches the TV on. Wally joins her in a few moments and she curls into him.

It's nice.

They stay like that for about point five milliseconds before there's a knock at the door.

"Are. You. Serious?" Artemis says, suddenly wide awake. Wally is pretty much asleep so she carefully untangles herself from him and goes to the door.

It's like someone put their address on a billboard or something.

Artemis yanks the door open.

Nothing.

Hmm.

She closes the door.

_Probably just the wind._

"Hey sis."

Artemis spins around and sitting at the kitchen table, calmly inspecting her nails, is Jade.

* * *

******Dedicated to Julia; thanks for all your help lovely!**


End file.
